![]() |
| Image from wesleying.org |
I wanted to shed a little light on this topic. Many times in my opinion we as females just go with the flow that HE created out of fear that he will view us as having issues if we tend to question things too much. In other words, we do what ever he wants just to gain and hopefully keep his interest. This can mean sleeping with him fast, loaning him money fast, letting him pretty much move in with you fast, revealing private or personal things about yourself too fast and believing everything he says fast. In my experience I can agree we as females don't want to appear as if we have this huge tall wall up blocking us from allowing the possibility of true love in so many times we tend to shift from our values a bit to make him happy. You have got to ask questions when things don't sound quite right whether he likes it or not.
So just how skeptical should you be when dating? In my opinion, very skeptical but he doesn't have to know to what degree. I mean you can have fun with him, spend time with him, be all the good things he wants in a female and listen to what he says all while watching what he actually does. That's the key to really finding out what he's about. Ask questions that's pertinent to you finding out just what he's really about. For example, I had a guy tell me once he's not looking for a woman who gives up her body to men all fast, but the next day he was eying my cleavage and asking me when am I going to give him some? What? This is what I mean, I heard what he said, but I watched what he did and he immediately contradicted his own statement. (Major turn off)
Below are a few things that you should many times question if a guy approaches you with these type issues.
- ( Him) Right now I'm still living with my mother.(You) So what's your plan of action to get back on your own? We all face set backs, but he needs to have a plan to get back on top.
- (Him) Can I crash over your crib a few nights a week until I get on my feet? (You) Not too comfortable with that just yet! The reason I say this is this crashing will soon turn into a permanent affair and next thing you know he's living with you rent free.
- (Him) I know we just met but I'm really feeling you, can I have you? (You) I'm not ready yet. I know it's tough ladies but WE have got to start back living the values of waiting until it feels right for both him and us, not just him. Being ready is one thing, but being just plain weak is another. Dont' fall for it, trust me it's own to the next one once he gets it. Make him wait until you're really ready.
- (Him) I know we just met a few days ago but can I borrow some money to pay my car note? I lost my wallet. ( You) I hate to hear that but I just don't have it right now. Please don't allow a guy to see if he can take advantage of you, especially when it comes to sex and money. This one loan will soon turn into a life time of YOU taking care of HIM. What real man would ask a female for money this fast? And just how would he have paid his car note if he'd never met you? Think about that!
- (Him) I'm not working right now but i really want to date you. (You) Do you need me to help you with your resume? What happened? Why aren't you working? Ladies make him own his issues don't just settle with him not working because he says he's not with no real good reason. Clearly there is no future unless he has a billion dollar savings stashed somewhere what can the two of you do together besides hunch in the bed room?. Now I'm not saying it's just about the money, but I am saying I wouldn't suggest getting too involved with a guy who clearly isn't trying to better himself.
- (Him) I have three kids but I haven't see them. I don't think their mine. (You) Did you sleep with the mother of these kids? Why don't you think their yours? Ladies nothing irritates me more than a man who doesn't take care of his children when he's being giving the chance to.
There are lots of things that you should be skeptical about when getting to know someone. This can be achieved without you coming across as an investigative reporter as long as you casually do it and always be observant. I mean I'm sure no one wants to feel like they are being analyzed from head to toe but somethings just have to be questioned or they are bound to come back in the future. I really hope these pointers help you out a bit and raise your awareness with just how much you allow too fast when dating and how much you let slip by that really should be questioned. Thanks for stopping bay and have a great day!
Tinzley Bradford

0 comments:
Post a Comment