Where is The Love ??? Everyday?

There was recently a play out called," Love Overboard." starring R&B singers Avant and KeKe Wyatt. This play was supposed to re-open the eyes of the many who have been in failed relationships and who have given up on love. One of the characters made a comment on a local radio station here in GA. that said," People Just Don't Know What They Want Anymore." I disagree with this comment, because I'm sure we all know what we want,yes we know, but finding it is the problem. If you are in love with someone and you are compromising through out the relationship then there is really no true love because it is a strong possibility that once the compromise stops, then so does the relationship. There are many people who have been scarred and they don't know they have been mentally destroyed from so many 'bad' experiences, until they have just given up. Many people have an emotionally damaged past that they are not aware of, yet they still try to be in relationships thinking this is the key. This is not the key, if you are not healthy and you have a lot of things going on in your life, or things that have gone on in your life causing you to constantly be down, sad, mad, or insecure; more than likely bringing that into a relationship can only make it worse. It's okay to seek therapy; you are not crazy for needing a professional who practices human behavior for a living. (Gossiping with your girlfriends or homeboys about your lover isn't always good therapy.)

People have forgotten about true love, the kind of love where one doesn't have to be in love with another, they just love unconditionally anyone they encounter. Many people are withdrawn and distant and very unfriendly. The way you act on a daily basis can play a vital role in the amount of joy and love you have. If you don't allow joy and love in, then there will be no joy and love to come out. A perfect example is, I went to the car wash the other day and it was crowded, naturally because it's a beautiful day and everyone wanted to wash their car. Tomorrow is Valentines Day and people are feeling good and getting ready for "love." It's interesting because I looked around and people were just washing their cars and not being social at all. No one wanted to make eye contact to at least say hello, I was right next to one person who I attempted to speak to, but they did all they could to avoid just saying a kind hello to me. How are you ready for love if you are too busy with yourself to allow something new and different to join you?

Below is an example of sparking a general conversation to a stranger.

Hello, how are you? (Say it with a bright, friendly smile.) Oh I’m feeling good and you? It's a beautiful day isn't it?( Or if it’s raining you can say something else.) Oh yeah it is I can't wait for what's in store! I know well you have a good day now. Okay I will, you too. Oh by the way, my name is Tinzley and what’s yours? My name is Todd, okay nice to meet you; same to you Tinzley. You seem so fun and friendly which is rare, are you seeing anyone?

And the rest is history, this example of a conversation shows the polite manner in which a possible date or at least a friendship can began. I always act this way when I go in public and I meet lots of people. While everyone may not always turn out to be long, lasting love, you will feel good that you invited it in, and at the least gained a friendship.

That is a nice simple conversation that can put a smile on anyone’s face, so much more personable than if I just said 'hey' and the other person said a dry 'hey.' Where is the love?

I am always smiling and inviting people in, I love to engage in conversations even with strangers. There doesn't always have to be any strings attached for just talking to someone. You will be surprised, instead of being so self involved, you might find true love by just opening up and allowing yourself to be loved. I love walking in a room full of dry, bitter people who look like they are mad at the world and just say ' hello. ' I love being in line at a grocery store and the person checking out looks back at my smiling face and my bright personality and sees me saying hello. They often smile immediately and say it back, sometimes we spark up a conversation. This is beautiful to me, and this is what I mean. I feel great doing this and i feel great just being a kind loving person.

I can't tell you enough how opening up and just allowing can impact your life. You will feel much better each day if when you wake up, you look in the mirror, smile big and bright and say hello to yourself and say it's going to be a great day. Then take that same feeling out of the door with you. There is nothing like it, you will notice the difference immediately. I asked where the love is. Well the love is laying inside you all you have to do is let it out and it will always come back to you, maybe sooner than you think.

Tinzley Bradford